Parking-lot pacing, I finish my cigarette and wing it towards a nearby sewer-grate, punctuating the perfect-shot swish with my usual dramatics: an over-exaggerated fist-pump signifying victory on all levels.
I turn to see a troop, nay, a legion of teenaged-girls staring at me, their eyebrows raised, their contorted faces betraying their disgust at my exuberance.
"What," I say, "you’ve never seen a feat of skill so breathtaking?"
Silence.
"It’s okay to be stricken," I continue.
"I understand that you don’t get to see something so awe-inspiring every day."
More silence...finally, one girl collapses into an "oh-my-GOD" that would have, were I fifteen years younger, made my nuts shrivel into Altoids. They, as a group, turn and begin their snickering, giggling walk away...one, on her own, turns back and spies me throwing her a brassy wink. She immediately relates this to her friends, and collectively:
"EEEEEWWWW!!"
Me, getting into my car: "Philistines."
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