Egomania & Dipshittery
Fury and Hilarity from a Jerk with a Thesaurus
Saturday, July 7, 2007
I am teaching a summer-course at a catholic school.
I am not teaching anything that has anything to do with religion.
I am sweating because I can’t quite figure out the air-conditioning.
I am looking for chalk and have found an empty liquor bottle.
I am looking at a poorly-researched project about Zeus on the back-wall corkboard.
I am enjoying talking to a captive audience.
I am varying my tone and cadence to keep the attention of the class.
I am yelling at the top of my lungs, startling teachers passing in the hall.
I am standing on a desk and looking into the eyes of surprised students.
I am withstanding glares from other teachers because I am smoking on my break.
I am being referred to as "Chris", and then as "that guy who looks like Chris".
I am giving the wall-mounted Jesus above the door a thumbs-up.
I am absolutely overusing the words "damn" and "hell".
I am accustomed to the silence of a joke failing.
I am more than happy to fill the void with my own laughter.
I am convincing someone to read
A Brave New World
I am convincing someone to go into film school instead of science.
I am being called a "wacko".
I am trying to think of a longer one-syllable word than "thoughts".
I am impressed that none of this has anything to do with what I’m teaching.
I am surprised that only 2 of my 13 students are male.
I am unsurprised that 3 of my students appear to be southpaws.
I am writing this while my students are taking a test.
I am acutely aware of my shredded vocal-chords after only 4 days of teaching.
I am having a fucking blast.
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